So far the novel-writing thing isn't working out. Instead I seem to be heading directly into middle aged-ness. For example I am listening to an inordinate amount of Harry Connick, Jr. (he really sounds like Mel "The Velvet Fog" Torme!). And I finished Shirley Maclaine's Hollywood autobiography (Danny Kaye was such a romantic--I just KNEW it!) which was, like me, more introverted than racy. I have seriously considered buying things online like movie soundtracks (the soundtrack to Grease, for example), and bath salts (Batherapy comes in 20 pound buckets!). The metal-studded belt doesn't seem to be keeping me as young as micro-liposuction might (I read about this in Vogue--maybe I'll get a subscription in my downward spiral towards total mediocrity!).

Perhaps I am still getting used to my new lifestyle. I am only working three days a week now, leaving a healthy and mind-bogglingly long chunk of time to accomplish my goal, which is to make money by doing it myself. What is "it" in particular? If novel-writing doesn't pan out, I may go into the craft business--people from New York City seem to like New England themed items like hooked rugs and chunky mittens. I could make them at home while listening to audiobooks and sell the results for $20 per square inch. However this has been my first week of having four days off in a row; I have spent most of my new free time doing laundry.

I spent two weeks in October on a "detox diet," following a Gaia Herbs program that involves swallowing both a fiber mix and an herbal extract capsule twice a day, and also consuming only soy products, fresh vegetables, whole grains, and green tea. During the two weeks I did nothing but bitch and moan and find new ways to eat tofu, but by the end I really felt a terrific INNER ENERGY coursing through my being...I felt calm and resilient and in order. Then I started a two week retox founded on wine and cheese and beer and coffee and croissants, and now I am just as cranky and conflicted as always. Woohoo!

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